I’ve got to say, I was damn near having PTSD flashbacks watching this man walk. That’s exactly what shape I was in twenty years ago. You don’t feel the pain as part of the memory, but you just hunch your shoulders, tighten your muscles and hold your breath due to a combination muscle memory and fear… you fear that pain. Once you know it, there’s no joking about it, and the thought of going back there can be absolutely paralyzing.
The pain was so excruciating, it felt like lightning strikes from even the slightest move in the wrong direction. If you put your right hand on your hip, that little dip where your thumb is resting was the point of origin for the pain and it went straight down my leg.
My primary care doctor just kept handing me pills… 40 mg Oxycontin three times a day, which I kept telling them that they weren’t working, but that was the new miracle drug on the scene then so in their opinion it was about finding the right dosage, no matter how high the dosage or how often it was taken because it couldn’t NOT work; it was a miracle after all, right?
I was given Percocet for breakthrough pain (which was incredibly necessary since it was ALL breakthrough pain!) but still mixed with the Oxycontin I was taking. Parkinson’s meds for the restless leg caused by a herniated disc, Klonopin because the pain caused me to be really anxious (go figure) and a host of more pharmaceutical granola, including the 150 mg of Zoloft I was taking twice a day mainly due to the pain meds and my Depo-Provera shots. I didn’t find out about Depo causing extreme depression until 7 years later.
No one thought to look at my neck even though they all knew what had happened to me in an earlier accident and the damage that was done. It’s been twenty years and I’m still dealing with the nerve and muscle damage in my neck and left trapezius muscle. At least now I know if this ever starts up again that the ice pack needs to go on my neck, not on my the back of my hip.
This really reinforces my dislike for allopathic practices, they treat the symptoms, they don’t work towards finding definitive answers regarding causative issues and never work towards curing or helping the body learn to help itself. Holistic approaches, treating the patient instead of the symptom, homeopathic remedies that take so little to do so much with no side effects, addictions, OD’s, etc. Considering the opioid problem we’re having in this country you’d think they’d shy away from things that are addictive or that you can OD from.
My gallbladder went rogue a couple of years ago and became my enemy. It took me a week of pain so severe that I was ready to die. The pain was so severe that it grossly exceeded my natural childbirth. I had a high fever joined with pain meds which caused me to hallucinate or pass out with horrific nightmares – that included feeling the pain from within the events of the nightmare. If it was a choice of staying in the bed to die or going down the mile long gravel road that rattled your teeth loose that would cause even more pain, I was ready to die in that bed.
I finally had a brief window where the pain had subsided so I asked my roommate at the time to take me to the ER where they admitted me immediately. Once the antibiotics started doing their job, the pain subsided as it should have (thank God!) and I didn’t need a whole lot of pain meds. I asked for a couple Tylenol and was instead given a shot of morphine! Why? Because it was easier for the staff. And again, it was over-medicating instead of dealing with the patient (in this case me) to see what’s going on instead of assuming. I finally told them then to mark my chart to say that I am allergic to morphine to keep them from doing it again.
Watching that video, all I could think was how much pain I would have been spared, how much time that Kid wouldn’t have been so neglected as a result, and that still throws shadows on our relationship to this day. How many people could be treated differently, not only with dignity but in partnership with their doctor to actively work together to solve or treat things to achieve the best outcomes for the patients? I have fibromyalgia and talk to anyone who has it and they can tell you about the disrespect and mistreatment and/or lack of treatment that they have had because of it.
This country needs to stop being grabbed by the ______ from the pharmaceutical companies that want us on multiple pills so they make multiple sales, and push for treatment because a cure doesn’t help their bottom line in perpetuity.
We need to be seen as patients, not as symptoms. We’re not a pile of disconnected body parts, we’re all connected, and it means that we shouldn’t be treated as a series of separate body parts. Maybe then we can return quality of live and work on being a healthier country overall.
We’ll talk again soon,