Category Archives: Op/Ed

How do you sleep at night?

Fox News Host Says We Shouldn’t Care About Border Separation Because “These Aren’t Our Kids”

I’m going to say this one time. If this is how you feel… Unfriend me. Block me. Lose my number. Forget my name. Remove any memory of me from your brain. Just leave.

In a segment of Fox and Friends, Fox News host Brian Kilmeade defended white nationalism and Trump’s family separation policy by claiming that “those aren’t our kids, and it’s not like Trump was doing this to the people of Idaho or Texas”.

Yes, really.

If this is how you feel, and these are the actions that you support and endorse our “president” for, you are a vile, reprehensible, disgusting, poor excuse of a human being. You don’t deserve friends, you don’t deserve a family, you don’t deserve children, you don’t even deserve so much as a damned goldfish.

I am embarrassed, disgusted and nauseated that not only are you my fellow countryman but that you represent this country and it’s culture to others around the globe.

And don’t you DARE utter the words “I’m a Christian”. Hell is too good for you.

America is on the wrong side of history and I am ashamed.

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How Can we Demand inclusion if we’re exclusive?

With all of the community news, events, and celebrations that come with June being LGBTQIA there’s still the undercurrent that the Cis/Hetero community isn’t necessarily aware of unless they are in some way connected.

Following posts and links and reading articles that all spill forth with Pride month, you get to see more than you may have bargained for. I was so thrilled to find this article about Budweiser and what they are doing to be Pride inclusive. Awesome. I wish more people and companies would follow suit. Thanks Budweiser!

Budweiser launches Pride cups in
EVERY color of the LGBTI rainbow

I came across this article, thanks to the Gay Star News, and was very excited to see the inclusion represented and the steps that they are taking. Unfortunately, that excitement was very short lived once I got to the comments… not from trolls, but from actual members of our community, denying acceptance and in some cases siding on the erasure of our own Rainbow Tribe family members.

” It’s bad enough polluting with more plastic, we’re polluting the lgbt with more of that “asexual” nonsense. ”

“So I am stuck getting a SJW cup.”

” But they’re not, and talking over actual lgbt people to pretend you are doesn’t get you anywhere. “

” asexual isn’t even lgbt. full stop. “

” Agender is a gender? “

” asexuality is not a part of pride, sorry. just because you arent attracted to any sex doesnt mean you are lgbt “

“I think you spelled that wrong. LGBT. Has been and always be that acronym. L – lesbian. G – Gay. B- bisexual. T- transgender. Quit adding your letters to try and feel validated. Sorry buddy. Just because you or someone else isn’t sexually attracted to a gender or a person. Doesn’t mean you are persecuted and name called and raped. No. Pride is for those that have been through that or DIDNT MAKE IT. Stop trying to push your way into this. You or whoever else that is asexual can be an ally.”

Tell me how inclusive the rainbow is when members of the community pick and choose who can and can’t join… it’s a not a 10-year-old’s tree house that says “Private. No girls allowed.”

It’s comments like these that are the exact reason that I am in love with the Progress Pride Flag.

Progress Pride Flag – Portland-based designer, Daniel Quasar, felt that the six-striped LGBT flag should be visually separated from the newer stripes due to their difference in meaning, as well as to “shift focus and emphasis to what is important in our current community climate.”

Anyone who is non-hetero, non-cis, non-hetero romantic and has a combination of reproductive organs of more than one sex is a member of the Rainbow Tribe known as LGBT, LGBTQ, and/or LGBTQIA+. Really. It’s that simple.

We have members of the gay community that are racist, members who are anti-trans, who are binary exclusive (TERFs). And, woohoo, we got a T, a Q, an I, and an A. Great for Wheel of Fortune, not so much for Transgender, queer/questioning, intersex and agender/asexual members of our community.

And let’s not forget the “+” added on as a catchall for other sexualities. You’re on the fringe so you get to be an asterisk and be put in the bargain bin and ignored.

And yet people they still refer to the 1978 rainbow flag as being a gay pride flag and the gay community is just one part of the LGBTQ* community.

I’ll be honest, I personally don’t think that the last 4 letters should have been put with the first three. Sexuality and gender are two different things and I think it adds to confusing the cis-heteros and rather than asking questions they just say we’re all fucked up and shut the door in our faces.  And how can we blame them for being undereducated on the subject when a large part of our own community is as well?

Late in the night of my 3rd birthday, less than 8 short miles from my home, transgender women started the Stonewall Riots and kicked off the beginning of the “gay rights” movement. “Gay rights.” And the only ones who seem know who started the movement are the ones in the trans community.  

Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera c.1969

The night of June 27, 1969 marks a historic turning point, putting the wheels in motion for contemporary LGBTQ+ rights in the US.
A routine police raid on the Stonewall Inn in New York City ignited a violent, multi-day rebellion after patrons of the bar resisted the discriminatory conditions they long endured and refused to take anymore abuse, discrimination, and hate. . 

“Gays” can now be in the military, get married, adopt kids, live where you want, work where you want and are covered under Title VII of the Civil Rights Act.

Trans folks? Nope, get out of our military and stay the fuck out of our bathrooms! I don’t want you to live near me, work with me, or be in school with “our” children.  

We have TERFs who say that non-binary folks – genderqueer, genderfluid, agender, pangender, demi gender, etc. aren’t *really* trans folks. Well we’ve got a choice in gender with only two options, cis or trans. That’s it. So if non-binary doesn’t count… who the fuck are we other than not welcome and invisible?  

We have gay & lesbian folks that say that asexuals aren’t one of “us”. In fact a poster on this very thread said they’re not allowed to be in the club because they haven’t struggled. Says who? Oh wait, and what makes your arrogant ass think that they need your damned permission? Again, two options… gay or straight. Straight, which is the baseline of “normal” or so it used to be called and still thought of by some, is pretty simple and pardon the pun, straight forward. So if you’re not straight, you’re a member of the Rainbow Tribe.  

You think you had it bad as gay or lesbian? At least you were acknowledged as existing. 

And as far as the inclusion of the brown and black stripes… there is too much racial divide in the gay community, and trans women of color are being slaughtered at such a rate that soon they’ll be classed as an endangered species. I hope we can have a telethon to save Laverne Cox at least. 

LGBTQIA+ – I know it’s a mouthful of letters, but we’re (allegedly) grown folks and unlike the guy in the oval who “knows the best words” (but can’t spell them), I think we can manage 5 to 7 letters. Can’t we? Tell me how we can ask and even demand acceptance if we’re not willing to accept members of our own community?   

New York City Monument Will Honor Transgender Activists Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera

The two women were instrumental in the 1969 Stonewall Uprising and spent their lives advocating for marginalized groups

Maggie ॐ 

Defend and Protect

Pro-Choice does not mean pro-abortion.

The first amendment not only guarantees my right to practice the tenets of my faith (or lack thereof) without government intervention or penalty, but it also protects me from having your beliefs forced upon me.

Roe v. Wade is based on the 4th Amendment regarding a right to privacy and the autonomy to make personal medical decisions without the intervention or inclusion of someone else.

Our military and our elected officials have sworn oaths to support and defend the Constitution of the United States of America. That means, that you/they swore an oath to defend my rights as laid out in the Constitution, regardless of personal views and beliefs.

It’s time for them to recognize the obligation that they swore: “so help me God”.

If you support the military, have been in the military or have ever mentioned how someone in your family fought for the rights of our citizens, etc, these are the rights they fought for.

Honor their fight. Be a patriot.
Stand up for the Constitution.

#YouKnowMe

I was going to share the graphic, along with a few words on Facebook. Those few words trickled out until they hemorrhaged through my keyboard. Sorry for the TMI, but it’s my truth.

So now instead of a few sweet words and a graphic, you get a very real, not sweet moments of my life in a blog Op/Ed. I hope that you can share your truth so that we all stand up for what is being done to us and against us in this moment of history.

– M​​aggie ॐ

 

 

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For the woman who has a miscarriage, where the body expels non-viable embryo or fetus, it is called a spontaneous abortion. I wonder how many of these bible banging hypocrites know their wives have had an abortion… against their will at that.

In 2006 I found out I was pregnant, only to miscarry shortly thereafter. It was an ectopic pregnancy which is when the fertilized egg nests in the fallopian tube rather than in the lining of the uterus. Normally an ectopic pregnancy doesn’t miscarry, but rather creates a life-threatening situation where the size of the embryo exceeds the interior width of the tube causing it to rupture and leaving no other choice but emergency surgery and in most cases, having the damaged fallopian tube to be removed.

Mine was unique in that I miscarried before it gained enough size to create the aforementioned situation. Generally, after a uterine miscarriage or abortion, a procedure known as a D&C (short for dilation and curettage) is performed to ensure that the uterus is completely cleared out. In my case, this was not an option because you can’t do a D&C on a fallopian tube, and while my tube had not ruptured, the threat was still there because any “residual cells” could continue to grow and rupture the tube anyway.

 

My husband and I went home that night from the ER, devastated and grieving for the child we had lost. A child who never got named anything other than “spontaneous abortion”. The following day, we were set to return for their improvisational treatment to address my unique situation, a course of chemotherapy that would retard and eliminate the growth of any “residual cells”.

 

In one of the cruelest situations of my life, I was to go – not to the cancer ward to have the chemotherapy administered – instead, they sent me to the OB/GYN department, where I got to sit at eye level with every pregnant belly, every inverted turkey-timer looking navel. And just when I thought that fate couldn’t get much crueler, the nurse came over with a clipboard with paperwork for me to complete, one of which was an authorization for an abortion.

 

The only word that applied then, and now, is “mindfuck”.   And the fun was just beginning… I started with the “I’m pregnant” pukies, only to be followed by the “I’m not pregnant anymore” pukies and the “chemotherapy” pukies. And just when you want to crawl inside a hole and die or find some way to hide from the people who knew you were pregnant and now ask how you’re doing… it got worse. I had to go for weekly blood draws to monitor my HCG levels.

 

HCG is the hormone that is detected in a pregnancy test. You see, my “residual cells” were still causing me to have those. And those weekly blood draws were to make sure that my HCG levels were staying the same or declining because there was still the chance that they could increase. If they did it would mean that my “residual cells” would be increasing in volume and surgery to remove them. 14 weeks. 14 weeks before my HCG levels finally started tapering off and maintained a steady decline.

 

I was pregnant, had a spontaneous abortion, had to give consent for them to perform an abortion, all while spending 14 weeks waiting to find out when I would finally stop being pregnant. I am pro-choice, but this was not my choice, far from it. The 11-year-old who was raped and is now pregnant, that wasn’t her choice either.

 

And now she gets to spend every day reliving the horror as her body continues to remind her of the worst day of her life while people force her to endure this day after day. Only for her to finally deliver (c-section would be my guess, 11-year-old bodies aren’t really ready to carry and naturally deliver a full-term child). So even if she is able to deal with the additional anguish of giving the child up for adoption, she’ll have that scar to give her warm memories of happier times, huh?

 

Silly me, I almost forgot If she does wind up keeping the child, she gets to co-parent with her rapist. Won’t that be fun?

 

Thanks to all the men who keep making laws about shit you don’t fucking have a clue about and the torture you inflict on others with your overblown sense of morality.

 

Fuck you.

 

Now that you’ve read my story, ask yourself where I would be in a state like Alabama if you were the doctor and what would you be allowed to do to treat me.

I mean that truly to be devoid of personal beliefs and judgment, just what you need to do, as a physician, to treat your patient under the mandate that if you perform, aid or assist in an abortion, then you are subject to personal liability and criminal prosecution. Tell me how you would have treated me or better yet if I would have lived.

Also, in the back of your head hold on to the thought that in Mississippi several years back they tried criminalizing abortion to the point that if a woman had a miscarriage that she would be charged with manslaughter.

It’s a very tangled issue, and blanket statements and legalities that don’t accommodate for cases of rape, incest, the viability of the fetus, the overall health and survivability of the woman just confuse and muddy the situation even further.

Abortion is not just some person who was too lazy to take birth control but doesn’t want kids.   And for the record, men are largely responsible for unplanned pregnancies.

Wake up and pay attention America

I try to keep politics off this page, but it gets to a point that it’s nearly impossible to do. It seems that many of us missed the reporting of the CPAC in 2017 where Trump supporters were waving Russian flags with his name on them. No. I’m not joking. I will post the link at the bottom of this post.

A fellow outraged American posted this response and I have to say it’s incredible and I felt that I needed to help it see the light of day instead of being buried and collecting dust as a response on a thread that will be hard to find in two days.

I want to thank the author for, what I consider to be, the most intelligent, most succinct, factual list of 45’s atrocities as President and the passive approval he receives from his supporters.

Many thanks to Mr. Durwin Bonds and his masterful summation of the last two years with 45 out front.

{{{hugs}}}

Maggie ॐ 

The referenced article can be found on HuffPo at http://tinyurl.com/y35gort9

Focus please

I love Robert Reich. He reminds me of the America I lived in and was taught to believe in as a kid. Uncle Sam hasn’t been seen or mentioned for a long time. He’s probably in a corner, medicated for severe depression and anxiety.

 

Talk to you soon,
Maggie ॐ
“Art and Giving are Food for the Soul”

Invisible People Are All Around Us

A poem and a story, neither are made to make you smile, but they will probably make you somewhat uncomfortable which honestly is what leads to change. I keep hoping that more people every day are a bit more uncomfortable, so they’ll look outside their comfort zone to help and affect change.

 

Hello, my name is Anna and I’m six years old

I live with my mama and papa They can’t always afford to feed me as often as they would like They can’t afford to buy me clothing very often We don’t have a house, but we have shelter sometimes I used to have a brother but he died I love my parents, and I know that love me too They try so very hard We are part of your society a part you either don’t see or won’t see I probably won’t be here very much longer I just wanted to say hello Hello my name is Anna and I’m ten years old My daddy died, Mama says someone shot him Mama has lots of friends, she says that’s how she pays the rent I used to have a brother but he died too, Mama said we couldn’t feed him anymore I worry about my Mama she puts needles in herself But she says” don’t worry baby God is coming for us all” I know that I’m supposed to believe in God and I guess I do I just haven’t seen him in my neighborhood Mama’s calling for me now I have to go make her lunch anyway I just wanted to say hello Hello, my name’s Anna and I’m fifteen. I know what my mama did to raise me, I understand now because I have a daughter now and I call her Anna… I’d do anything to make sure that she has enough food and clothes, but things keep getting in the way. it’s so expensive, and they want so much from me. I love my little girl but sometimes when she cries when she’s hungry I just want to get away… so I do… Hello, My name is Ella or so I’m told, they told me that my Mama named me after my grandma, but I never knew her They tell they she loved me very much but I never knew I should have had a daddy but they never knew
They are closing the home tomorrow because they have no money
I ask where will I go but n body knows

Hello, My name is Ella and I’m 12 years old,
for as long as I can remember I’ve been sold from pimp to pimp for cigarettes or pool wagers or on a whim,
I am chattel, I am worthless. I don’t even care enough to despair

Hello, My name is Ella I’m a corpse under a bridge, I’ve been here for weeks and no one seemed to notice,
I wonder why that is

~ Anonymous

There was a woman I lived with, in the shelter.  Her husband (who at first everyone thought was her father) had a stroke, confined to a wheelchair, had to be fed and changed, unintelligible speak to those unfamiliar.  She didn’t know enough to apply for social security then, they had a young daughter…8 maybe, who would come “home” after school and be her dad’s caretaker until Mom got “home” around midnight, walking both ways because the car they had been living in had been repossessed.

On the way “home” one night she encountered 3 thugs, one of which had been kicked out of the shelter for being an asshole. She was the one who got him bounced out because she asked him to watch his mouth around her daughter and he wouldn’t, got puffy with a guard and he was out for good.  Not a good thing in Colorado in the winter. So here she was, alone, walking “home” and a thug with a vendetta and two buddies decided to drive train on her.

I couldn’t sleep at night back then either so I was awake when she came in late, hair messed up, her uniform was a mess.  We all knew something was wrong. A couple of us, asked her, helped her get cleaned up, we tried telling her to go to the hospital to get checked out and she said she couldn’t because if they admitted her she couldn’t leave her 8-year-old daughter there to take care of her father.  We all offered to help, I even told her that I’d drive her so that everyone wouldn’t be nosy if an ambulance showed up. No, she said, I just need to be with my family right now. She climbed into her bunk between her daughter and her husband and she cried all night. She told him what happened, we could see it in his face when she told him.  He sobbed for 3 days straight

We all chipped in to buy her a new pair of work pants so she could still go to work. They were ripped pretty badly when she was attacked.  By dinner time the next day, the entire shelter knew what happened. The guards let a couple of the guys out so they could walk her home. Lockdown was at 10, lights out at 10:30.  And if you didn’t have a pre-authorized pass signed by your employer, you could have had Jesus himself with you for backup, and you *still* weren’t getting in, but the guards let the guys would go every night to go get her and bring her back.  And the guys all took turns, this way if anyone was watching they’d know that there were more than two guys backing her up.

Sunday night was special.  We all went to Church in Manitou Springs, where they served dinner… real food, not the crap we were used to.  I had a Chevette so I would earn gas money from people to take them places. On Sunday nights it was good because I could get three guys in the backseat plus my boyfriend up front with me.  They all gave me $5 each and gas was 99¢ a gallon (I did it for the ones who went to the plasma center too because they were not up to walking back.)

Anyway, we all were sitting down with our plates…it was loud, happy talk because of a real mean and a change of scenery, dishes, silverware, and glasses all clanking and banging.  The pastor of the church would have everyone bow their heads and he’d say grace then we could eat. Well he said grace, we dug in and a few minutes later you could hear a pin drop.

Those three guys that raped her made the mistake of coming into the Church basement for.  The two guys behind him new their world was going to change when they turned around to leave and there were two guys barring the door.  The leader, I don’t remember his name from 31 years ago, but I remember his face. He was the blackest person I’d ever seen. Skin the color of espresso, the only thing that gave him away in the dark was his teeth and his eyes.  He was wearing a black leather jack and on his shoulder a heavy chain with a metal padlock on it.

The pastor came out and asked what was going on and one of the guys told him.  He looked at those three, grossly outnumbered and said, sorry we’re full and there’s no more to eat, boys will you help him find the way to his car.  The guy spoke up telling the Pastor that he didn’t have a car. So the pastor said God doesn’t care if you have a car or not, he cares about other things.  Boys if you’d see them out to their car, I have to go check on dessert.

They weren’t even out of the basement (double glass doors leading out to the parking lot) when it all took off.  He rolled his shoulder to dropped that chain to put it in his hand it got snatched away from him while his face stopped someone’s fist. The guy who grabbed the chain from him swung it…

I’d never seen a cheekbone and was surprised at just how white it was but that was of course in contrast with the espresso colored skin and the bright red blood that was now going everywhere. The next blast was a right hook that cold-cocked him.  So then he was dragged out into the parking lot and when he came to a couple of minutes later, he was freaking out about how he got there and the amount of blood ( a bit dazed don’t you know) and he got his ass kicked again. They took off as quickly as they could and our guys came back in just as the pastor came out, took one look at them and said “boys, it was very Christian-like for you to help those gentlemen with their car trouble, but you’ve all gotten so dirty, you need to all come in the kitchen and wash up all of you, you need to be presentable for dinner.  I didn’t leave there for another couple of months but that guy was never seen around town ever again to my brief knowledge.

My fibro doesn’t allow me to remember their names, but I really do hope that the couple and their daughter were able to move on and move up. I hope they were given access to the service they needed to survive and with any luck, they were able to get help for all that they had endured.  So why did I offer this tome that rivals War and Peace?

The problem is that these people and me at the time and even now as a disabled person,  is that we are/were invisible. I swear, I would love 10 acres of land, cover it with tiny houses, solar panels on every roof, mandatory recycling, a place in the middle with a laundry room and hot showers (just in case you’re too tall or just fluffy like me), wifi for the community, since nowadays places will only take applications online.  

A community center with a couple of computers for kids to do homework, gather up books for a take a book/leave a book library, the same goes for DVD’s and we would have weekend gatherings so you could get to know your neighbors and know that you’re not alone, you’re not the only person that this has happened to and you have people at your side, on your side, to give you the strength to get up, dust yourself off, and do what it is that will get you moving forward again.   Everyone would be required to pitch in taking care of the community…. emptying trash, raking leaves or cutting grass or shoveling snow, helping someone with a handyman project, etc and with the premise  that this is temporary,  to give you what you need to get your life back together or create a new one and you move up and onward,  and let that tiny house help out the next person or couple in need.

Well if anyone has $150K and can’t think of what to do with it, give me a call.

In the meantime, thanks for listening and please, don’t have invisible people surround you.  Look for them and you’ll see.  Click on one of the links to find out how you can help.

Maggie ॐ
“Art and Giving are Food for the Soul”
 

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